Christians Struggling with Sin and 4 Lies We Believe

In more ways than one, the truth will set you free.

Everybody sins. But when Christians do it, reactions vary. The culture says we’re hypocrites—and often uses our sin to justify their own. Other Christians may view our sins as proof we aren’t even saved.

Christians Struggling with Sin and 4 Lies We Believe

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But the people who offer the most brutal judgment against our sins?

Very often, it’s ourselves.

That’s because Christians struggling with sin tend to believe these four lies.

LIE #1: As a Christian, I should live a perfect life.

We may not admit this out loud, because it sounds extreme. But we often think it. After all, didn’t Jesus say, “Be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect” (Matthew 5:48)?

  • Absolutely. But Jesus referred to God’s standard we should strive for. Jesus also understood the reality that we fail that standard. That’s why He died for our sins.
  • What we really tell ourselves with this lie is: “If I’m not perfect, God is angry with me.” When we listen to the lie, we confuse our freedom from sin’s penalty with our freedom from sin’s presence.

I love Chuck Swindoll’s definition of the term, justification:

Justification is the sovereign act of God whereby He declares righteous the believing sinner while he or she is still in a sinning state.

When we believe in Jesus, God doesn’t make us righteous. He declares us righteous. We’re still sinners who aren’t free from sin’s temptations. Our being made righteous won’t occur until our death or the Rapture—whichever comes first. (I’m pulling for the Rapture.)

LIE #2: I’ve tried to stop sinning, but I can’t. I must not be saved.

This lie takes the false assumption of LIE #1 a step further. Because you don’t live a perfect life like you should, that means you were never saved to begin with.

  • But think about it. Just as we couldn’t save ourselves—we needed God’s grace (Ephesians 2:8-9)—so we cannot live the Christian life in our own strength.
  • We still need God’s grace to provide the strength for obedience.
  • The Apostle John reminds us that we lie if we say we have no sin—and that Jesus is our atoning sacrifice for that very reason (1 John 1:8; 2:1).
God the Father never abandons His children

(Photo courtesy of Unsplash)

The truth is, your struggle against sin is a huge clue that the Spirit of God is working in your life. Because the New Testament constantly gives instruction to Christians struggling with sin, we understand that it is a normal experience.

  • Scripture speaks not only to the temptations this world offers but it also reminds us of our ongoing vulnerability to those temptations (2 Corinthians 6:14).
  • The same weaknesses that bound us to sin in the old life we bring with us into the new.

LIE #3: I’ll never stop my sin, so why try?

While it’s true you’ll never be free from temptation or from the pull in your heart towards sin, you can experience victory. (Unlike a circus elephant who doesn’t know any better.)

  • Freedom of choice is part of who God made us to be as humans. God created Adam and Eve with the capacity to choose (Genesis 2:16-17). Begin to see temptation as a choice rather than as a compulsion to obey (Romans 6:12-14).
  • God delivered us from sin’s slavery in order to obey Him, not so that we would submit ourselves again to sin’s shackles (Galatians 5:1). Freedom has a purpose: obedience.

LIE #4: My sin is too great. I’m really not sure God will forgive me.

Sometimes Christians struggling with sin blow it big-time. And because we knew better—and yet did it anyway—we fall for the lie that tells us we crossed a point of no return with God.

  • Actually, this lie stems from our pride. There is no sin—NO SIN—too great for God’s forgiveness. Your sin is no exception. There may be life-long consequences, but God’s grace always offers forgiveness.
  • The Lord has given you the promise that if you have believed in Jesus who died for your sins, God has already accepted you.

Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. —Romans 8:1

Remember, you cannot out-sin the grace of God. God never abandons His children.

In another post, I’ve shared four strategies to help combat these four lies.

Question: What other lies do Christians struggling with sin believe? To leave a comment, just click here.

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  • Tom

    Thank you for this lesson. it was very helpful. As Christians we are told to repent as well. Is there a lie about not repenting. How does one truly repent if we stumble so easily. Is it the struggle itself that bears the fruit of repentance? I have remorse over my sins but feel helpless at times to resist. Does that mean my repentance is in vane?

    • Tom, you’ve really nailed essence of the struggle. The word “repent” literally means a change of mind.” We get the cart before the horse when we think that “repent” simply means to change one’s actions. No lasting change comes until the mind changes first (Rom. 12:1-2).

      While we certainly can repent in a moment—and change our mind about something—it may take time to find victory in our actions about that decision. Repentance doesn’t remove the sinful nature inside us anymore than we can repent for the nose on our face. While the changing of our minds can occur in a moment, the renewing of the mind is a daily process. It’s when you quit struggling with it that you should worry. You are running a marathon, not a sprint. Just keep running and never quit or take the path of least resistance.

      Feeling helpless to resist reminds me of the post about the elephant. You might also check out the post that follows this one; it’s about four strategies to help combat these four lies. Thanks, Tom.

      • Greg Tegman

        I know I should never lie, yet, I seem hopeless with this. Why do I do this? Is it because I have nothing good enough to say and I have to make up something to be accepted? I am a 57 year old man whom is in terror over this seemingly impossible habit. Somebody…please show me how I can overcome my fearful problem.

        • You’re far from hopeless, Greg, although I understand how habitual sin can rob you of peace of mind and joy. As I suggested to Tom, you might read the post about the elephant. I also think listening to this message may help you understand why you have such a strong fear of man. Certainly it would help you to set up for yourself some godly accountability, but the first and most important issue is to settle your relationship with Jesus Christ. Likely, you’ll never conquer your habit without His help.

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  • Ell

    This is gorgeous, brother. You’ve presented clear gospel truths, facing these major demonic lies head on, what a blessing!

    • Thank you, Ell. I’ve never thought about the truth as “gorgeous,” but you know? It is! Truth is beautiful indeed. Thanks.

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  • Logan

    This post has really helped me, but could I ask a clarifying question(s)? When the Bible comes down hard and lists “shall not inherit the kingdom of God” stuff and I find my struggles on that specific list, what does that mean for me? When Hebrews 10:26 and on talk about deliberate sin and there not being a sacrifice for that what does that mean for a Christian struggling with habitual sin? Reading the Bible sometimes seems to hinder me rather than help me. Why is it so internally inconsistent, or seemingly so? Although this is an old post, I really do hope someone responds.

    • Great questions, Logan. Any sin keeps a person from the kingdom of God, so we should be surprised if we don’t see our sins listed someplace. But the passage you speak of (1 Corinthians 6:9-11) ends with these essential words: “Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.” In other words, Paul isn’t listing exceptions to God’s grace but testimonies to it. My struggles are on that list too, Logan, right along with yours, but Jesus died for them all—and forgives all when we believe in Him.

      The warning passages in Hebrews may, on the surface, appear contradictory, but they offer a consistent message when understood in context. Give a listen to this message I gave, called: “Are You Sure You’re Secure?” I think it addresses your very concerns.

      What seem as contradictions in the Bible really do prove, the more we study it, as limitations on our part. I address the issue generally in this post, but you might also find helpful the book called, When Critics Ask.

      I hope this helps some, Logan. You’re not alone. God bless.

  • Alan

    wats the difference between struggling with sin and a lukewarm Christian

    • Great question. It seems the primary difference comes in the effort and goals. A lukewarm believer has lost the passionate pursuit of seeking God. In some sense, he or she doesn’t really struggle against sin, but goes with it. They need to get back in the fight. But even strong believers struggle against sin. We will until we die. Thanks for asking.

  • TheDexxJ .

    So if God will never kick us out of His kingdom for our struggle with sin or sins we commit. How can a so called church of elders and pastors excommunicate a believer in Christ for a “perceived lack of repentance”? Yes this happened…

    • Not sure of your situation, Dexx, but it’s possible the church is attempting to follow the process Jesus laid out in Matthew 18:15-17. Even when church discipline needs to occur, its goal must always be restoration. It must be, or it’s not biblical. Fortunately, our God is a righteous judge who makes no errors in judgment. We humans fail often—even those in leadership. One who has placed his or her faith in Christ will never lose his or her place in God’s kingdom—the errors human leadership notwithstanding.

      • TheDexxJ .

        Thanks that’s very reassuring. I would like God to get the glory in all matters of life. I am VERY aware of my sins at this point in my life and sometimes being aware of my fallen nature is very discouraging. However, I understand that one day I will be without this fallen nature and I can and will enjoy God face to face. No interuptions and no seeing through a hazy mirrors.

        • I’m right there with you. It’s comforting that Paul also struggled against sin (Romans 7). It might help to reflect again on the two kinds of forgiveness. Thanks, Dexx. Just press on.

  • fredbird67

    Wayne, thank you, brother. I really needed to hear this. On your strategies you mentioned to help us in our struggles with sin, on that last one, I thought “Jonathan Edwards had struggles with sin, too?” Since he’s best known for his sermon “Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God”, that’s so encouraging to see that someone who so boldly, candidly, and bluntly told it like it is regarding what happens to those who die without Christ had his struggles with sin, too. This gives me great encouragement to see that the saints of old had their struggles with sin, too.

    Something else you said is something I struggle with too — the notion that I’m supposed to be perfectly sinless, and then I expect too much out of myself…and then, before I know it, I sin. How do I break myself of that mentality?

    • I would meditate deeply on the truth of Romans 8:29-30. Having believed in Jesus, you are as good as perfected in God’s eyes–all your sin notwithstanding. Also, check out this post about to think truth and quit knee-jerking to past habits or thought patterns. Finally, always, always keep in mind the end of the story.

      You mentioned Edwards. Indeed, he was only human like the rest of us. Even Paul struggled with sin, you know? (Romans 7:14-15)

      • fredbird67

        Yes, I’m well aware of that, like he said in Romans chapter 7. Also, I can’t help but wonder if Paul’s “thorn in the flesh” statement referred to a sin he struggled with, too. Besides, I often have to remind myself that if I weren’t saved, the fact that I do sin on occasion wouldn’t bother me (Hebrews 12:7-11).

        • ort

          Paul’s thorn was “a messenger of satan sent to buffet me lest I be exalted above all measure.” It was to keep Paul’s ego in check because he was the paramount of all the apostles because of his revelations from Jesus Himself.
          Therefore, Paul was whipped, beaten with rods, and stoned to death.

  • Billiewilliesillie

    I need help. I’m struggling with sin, and It’s killing me. I don’t mean that as just an expression I mean it is literally murdering me.

    • I’ll take you seriously enough to pray for you—I can’t imagine your situation. If sin endangers your life, then do whatever it takes to deal with it. Find good Christian counselor in your area and call them today.

  • mishy

    another confusing part for a christian struggling with sin is when it comes to the struggle to forgive deliberate offenders. other christians always utter judgement by advising you that if you struggle to forgive consistently then maybe you yourself have not truly experienced God’s forgiveness, because you can’t give what you don’t have

    • It’s always easy to talk about forgiveness until you have something tough to forgive. Set other Christians and their opinions aside, and just look at Scripture. There are reasons why forgiving someone is hard. I have found the greatest help in forgiving others is found in God’s sovereignty. Watch an interview I recently did on this. You might also find encouragement in my new book, Waiting on God, which has a whole chapter devoted to forgiveness and how to do it.

      • mishy

        sir, i am suprised that you would really actually take sincere time to reply. i’ll try to watch the interview this weekend and will check your book in bookstore. i hope you won’t get tired of helping us understand certain things. coz i have almost common experience with pastors and bible group leaders, that they are nice and accommodating at first, but when you push through with difficult concerns, they just want to shut you off and go on with their own lives and “ministries”. have a blessed weekend.

        • That makes sense. But remember, only Jesus is the perfect Shepherd. The rest of the pastors are doing their best with tremendous pressures, including their own struggles, families, and many other sheep to look after. Don’t give up on your pastors. In fact, see what you can do to support them. God bless.

  • Tuppence

    it was touched on a little but my personal struggle with sin is that I can’t seem to reconcile with myself that I am a sinner…not because I think I don’t stuff up because I do daily, but I feel I have failed God. I have failed being perfect for God and I can’t reconcile that with myself. If a friend told me this I would say to them that’s why Jesus needed to come for us. It’s like I think it’s OK for others to accept the grace of God but for me I need to be perfect first…and of course I fail and feel worse.

    • It seems you may be listening to voice of the enemy that tells you somehow you’re different or an exception to God’s perfect provision. It’s easy to feel that way when we are the most familiar with our own sin. If we could uncover the manhole over our hearts and look inside, we’d see a tar pit a mile deep. Of course, it’s too uncomfortable to do that, so we keep the lid on tight. But the Lord reveals our blind spots anyway—not to shame us but to give us an appreciation for his grace. How? By helping us realize He sees our mile-deep tar pit—as well as the other ten miles below it we can’t see. He sees the raw, ugly parts of our heart we never knew to look for—and yet, He loves us anyway. When He meets us in these places of our weakness, He brings His grace along.

      Because Jesus Christ died for our sins and rose again, His grace reverses our focus when we come face to face with our sin. Instead of coiling in a fetal position of shame, we grow to realize the depth of His love and the extent of His grace. God’s grace makes it safe for us to see ourselves because we know that, regardless of what we find, God will never reject us. When He looks at us, He sees the righteousness of His holy Son, Jesus—all our weaknesses notwithstanding.

      • Tuppence

        Thank you Wayne, I will pray on what you have said. I guess what I am understanding is that there is good and bad in all of us so perfection is an extremely unrealistic goal to have; yet with Jesus Christ we are made whole and perfect in our Fathers eyes. This doesn’t mean there wont be stuff ups but that we are constantly being restored and made whole through Jesus Christ our saviour.
        Thank you as well for this blog. I have been wondering about this for a long time and didn’t have anyone to really ask about it. Blessings.

      • Robert Johnson

        As i read the sermon on the Mount the lord saying you think you dont need grace well here is the essentials to do it on your own …its to show us how little we can do or dont do to get to perfection

        • Great question, Robert. The Sermon on the Mount is Jesus’ way of explaining how to enter the kingdom He has been proclaiming is at hand. God’s standard is His own holiness (Matt. 5:48), and since we cannot attain to that on our own, we need to enter through the narrow gate—which is Jesus (ch. 7). Thanks, and God bless.

      • Christina Huang Jenny

        I am a perfectionist. I was wanted to be holy like Paul, who met the Lord and instant transformed. But I failed badly, so much till I beat myself up for it at times. I feel so sinful that I do not have the face to face God and to pray. Then always, He reminded me of the cross, makes me always be able to walk out of shame and guilt and return back to God and pray. When I sin and failed again, I will always go back and confess sins and pray, most of the time is immediately. Everyday, till today, I will always return back to God and confess sins and pray. When I sin, I will trust in the future holiness God promised and after lots of persecutions, sufferings and pain, I finally achieved this holiness. I am but a newborn Christian of 5 years and nearly 3 months old baby girl. But due to my desire to be like Christ, I prayed hard every moment of my life, praying to be more like him, closed myself in my world and intense relationship with God, praying sinners’ prayer unceasingly, for my mind never stopped sinning, praying to have God’s heart, praying to be like Jesus in every way, with faith he would answer my prayer, sacrifically giving to the poor, makes me grow in my faith in God. When accused, I remained silent like God. When persecuted, I bless. I not only talks, when I do the word. Anyone can do this. Hear the word and do it.
        When we do it, we will realise nothing else matters. I may become evil in the sight of men, for forsaking my responsibilities, but didn’t God told us: Deny yourself, carry your cross and follow me?
        This is what happens. You on the appearance seemed to have been unfilial, whole day about God, but, God is very pleased with you, and you get your heart desires. I had a time I was sad, for not spending time with my son. But when I see my son growing in wisdom, stature, have God’s favor and men favor, and everything I wanted seen in him, I found out that what I am doing is the right thing. To be totally in God, mind filled of God, in my heart, soul, spirit, uses all my strength to do things related to God, and he blessed me with everything I wanted. He opened my eyes to realise that, by trying to get what I want, I will surely fail. But when I live in God from wake up till I sleep, sometimes woke up due to sudden dreamt about God, this is the right way to live. God bless you.

        • Thanks for sharing your story, Christina. May the Lord bless you as you seek to follow Him. May you rest in the grace that saved you. God bless.

  • Lance Floresca Price

    Wow even though this article is old, the message behind it will continue to give knowledge to future Christians. Its 2015, i am reading this for my spiritual health. Lemme talk to our Dad about what i learned today. Thank you brother. God bless!

    • You’re welcome, Lance. Yes, the message of God’s Word remains timeless and true. Thanks.

  • david

    Hi there. I professed Christ in the 7th grade and then fell into all kinds of sin in college including looking into other religions. I began practicing a different religion. I had a moment where I believe the Lord called me back and I really felt awful. I also started to get very bad headaches which put me on pain medicine. I believe God wanted me off the pain medicine so I went off. It’s been a very dark road and I feel as if I have fallen from grace. My mind is filled with blasphemous thoughts. And the thought of what I did in college is with me all the time. I also struggle mentally with all the withdrawal effects and my own sin. I realized how selfish I have been for years and have been crying out to God for help, but I feel alone. I believe in Jesus. I confess Him as Lord, but I have been wrecked for the last few weeks because I feel like I committed a sin too great. My heart has been so broken. I have felt such heartache. I am seeking after Him harder than ever. Will I ever feel His embrace again? I am a wicked man.

    • If we’re honest, David, we could all claim wicked hearts in our selves. But that needn’t be a reason or an excuse to accepting God’s remedy for our sin in Christ. God has given us promises for our hope and security. You cannot fall from grace, “otherwise grace is no longer grace” (Romans 11:6). Actually, the pain that God has allowed in your life is there for a good reason. It’s because He loves you, David. Your failures—no matter how bad they are—cannot negate God’s grace. Don’t listen to the lies that say otherwise. Make today a new beginning—right now.

    • Simon Frederic Marx

      Don’t take this the wrong way, David, but is it possible that you have OCD? If you’ve got an anxiety disorder, then it’s very possible that you’ve also got OCD (or even if you don’t have an anxiety disorder). Religious OCD, also known as scrupulosity, can oftentimes manifest itself as blasphemous thoughts, and it makes people experience a lot of doubt, no matter how many reassuring Bible verses they read. Maybe it’s something to look into? Hang in there!

  • Jessica Kurtz

    It is so crazy, but the way I had found this page is because I was listening to Chuck Swindoll’s sermon on Romans 8:1 called “Let’s talk about our walk.” and the question I wrote to myself was “Can you be in Christ and still sin?” That is what I decided to google and by God’s awesomeness I found this. What a great God we serve! Were you listening to this message when you wrote this?

    • No I wasn’t, Jessica, but it’s great that we’re saying the same thing! 🙂 You know, if the Bible says it, our takeaways from it ought to be the same applications. By the way, I work for Chuck at Insight for Living Ministries. Did you know? Thanks for your comment–and God bless you.

  • wft2969

    Thank you for this post. I struggle with certain sins and when I commit them, I get frustrated, beat myself up, ask for forgiveness and try not to do them again. I always fear eternal condemnation for some sins, realize my errors, know that they are wrong but continue the frustrating patterns (Romans 7:14-25). I know that Salvation requires me to change and turn from my sins and I am successful in some areas better than others. Unfortunately, I often lose my Joy and happiness getting so upset with myself when I tell myself I will not do something wrong, then go ahead and do it anyway fearing eternal separation from God.

    • We all struggle in different ways. Every one of us has dark places of doubt, discouragement, and sin. If we could uncover the manhole over our hearts and look inside, we’d see a tar pit a mile deep. Of course, it’s too uncomfortable to do that, so we keep the lid on tight. But the Lord reveals our blind spots anyway—not to shame us but to give us an appreciation for his grace. How? By helping us realize he sees our mile-deep tar pit—as well as the other ten miles below it we can’t see. He sees the raw, ugly parts of our heart we never knew to look for—and yet, he loves us anyway. When he meets us in these places of our weakness, he brings his grace along.

      Please read this carefully: the good news? You don’t have to clean up your life before God will accept you. It’s impossible to earn your way into His favor. Instead, we come to Him as a gift by His grace. We come to Him in faith that Jesus’ death on the cross has paid for all of our sins—past, present, and future. Just believe it—and you’re forgiven (Ephesians 2:8-9).

      Because Jesus Christ died for our sins and rose again, his grace reverses our focus when we come face to face with our sin. Instead of coiling in a fetal position of shame, we grow to realize the depth of his love and the extent of his grace. God’s grace makes it safe for us to see ourselves because we know that, regardless of what we find, God will never reject us. When he looks at us, he sees the righteousness of his holy Son, Jesus—all our weaknesses notwithstanding.

      You cannot lose by your works what you gained by God’s grace.

      • wft2969

        Wow! Thank you.

        • You’re very welcome. God bless you as you enjoy the freedom that is yours in Christ.

  • liramk3

    Was born in a saved family and have known God since birth however I began to live in sin as I left home but always went back to God when things get harder because he is the only solution in my life 2006 I then left my birth country to the other and there I changed my name and surname and nationality all in order for me to live as a citizen of that country and not as a foreigner and it was hard bieng a foreigner 2 years later I moved overseas under the same name and nationality everyone in my family knows about this and they have never had a problem with it, am now settled and even married and have gone back to the Lord however that keeps me from growing as I feel like I am a fraud, I have no idea what to do and I feel like me having to lie about myself makes God punish me and not forgive me, I repent each and every day about this but I feel like am not forgiven can God forgive and accept me as I am or not?

    • If I’m understanding you correctly, you’re saying that what you’ve done in your past makes you feel like a fraud today—and that past deception causes you doubt about your relationship with God. I hope you’ll hear this as if from the Lord, as I speak simply from what God has written in His Word.

      If you have accepted Jesus Christ, He has accepted you. You cannot out-sin the grace of God. When Jesus died on the cross, He died for every sin you committed—including this issue you can’t seem to get past. Look again at Lie #4 above and remember God’s promise to you: “Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 8:1)

      Rest in the forgiveness that God offers you through Christ. It may help you also to read this post on the two types of forgiveness.

      • liramk3

        Yes the issue of me changing my identity in the past torments me, makes feel like am not who I say I am to people, as nobody else knows about this apart from my family, thank you very much Wayne for your response makes me feel better already..God bless you

        • You’re welcome. It always helps me to remember God’s grace for us in Christ is bigger than any sin we have ever done. No remorse you feel can add to what Jesus has already done for us.

  • Daniel Good

    I have been struggling with a sin for over 10 years now. I don’t want to live this way but I keep turning back to it. I have prayed for God to deliver from it and it still hasn’t happened I believe Jesus is Lord and savior and want to walk in his ways. Someone told me God will not be mocked does that mean he will not rorgive you up to a number of times in your life. How do I change and stop This sin.

    • I hear you, Daniel. I understand the frustrating nature of a besetting sin that seems to dominate your life and heart. The fact that you’re a Christian makes you a target from the enemy, but it also provides you the strength from God and others to find victory. It really is possible. I urge you to read this post about Romans 6, to make yourself accountable to a small group of men, and you may also find genuine help in this book. God bless. You’re not alone. I’m praying for you.

  • Sam Vahedi

    Thank you for this encouragement

  • Robert Johnson

    Thank you ..i have been a Christian for 33 years with a 20 yr trip in tge wilderness. Running. .wanting nothing to do with God but even tho I wasa long way off he was still father. ……i believe i was just as saved then in the desert wilderness and darkness … as i am now confessed and recommitted and still a sinner daily not perfect n the light…… just now I enjoy a unobstructed relationship. …but saved for 33 not 13 ……

    • Certainly, Robert, God’s grace is large enough to forgive us when we sin, but He has also given us the power to say no to sin. The key is to do your best and to simply confess when you fail (1 Jn. 1:9). Also accountability is essential. Thanks.

  • RUkiddingme? ✓ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ

    I was baptized and raised in the Catholic church, then switched to a Lutheran church after I was saved and for awhile followed the protestant teachings. Now I have moved away from those and am still struggling with legalism in my walk with God. This past year I have had two bad car accidents and a close scare with a lump in my neck that turned out to be benign. I am starting to wonder if God is warning me that if I still struggle with the same sins in my life, he will take my life next time? I am continuing to understand these incidents and now scared about what this all means. Yes, I still struggle with legalism, and it is hard to not believe that while I know God is a God of grace and mercy, he is also a God of justice and will act accordingly. I am not afraid to die, but to die because God was angry with me is pretty scary.

    • Struggling with sins is what you want to be doing—rather than giving in. Even Paul struggled (Rom. 7). God has given you the power through Christ to no longer be a slave to sin. I urge you to read The Grace Awakening by Charles Swindoll. It will help clear the fog you’re in right now.

      • RUkiddingme? ✓ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ

        Thank you for your response. Yes, I will check out that book.

  • Eric C

    Wayne Stiles. I appreciate your blog. I ran across it and I’m so glad I did. I’m 28 struggling with pornography. I understand the grace message and how it’s all finished. What could be wrong with me that I keep falling for the same trap?

    • So good to hear from you, Eric. You must know that you’re not alone in your struggle. At some level, all of us men fight the violent temptation to take a shortcut rather than wait on God. I believe your challenge is one of habit that needs retraining by godly habits and accountability. Let me encourage you to take a few practical steps:
      1. Get the book, The Game Plan, by Joe Dallas. It is the best book I’ve ever seen for this area of struggle. Commit to doing what the book says for the next 30 days.
      2. Get in an accountability group with other men. This is a non-negotiable if you want consistent encouragement. You are not alone.
      3. Make your personal time with God each morning another must-do. This includes reading the Bible, of course. Your propensity to reach for the forbidden fruit will diminish the closer you walk with God and read His Word.

      There’s no quick fix, but I promise you it’s not hopeless either. No matter how many times you stumble, never give up the fight. There truly is freedom waiting for you.

  • Dee Jaye

    I literally searched for this because of what happened last night. Someone told me that I was dirty fake, ugly and nothing. Absolutely nothing because of a simple misunderstanding that got blown out of proportions on both sides. Her words have just begun to sink and I do feel like nothing. It’s like the sins I struggle with or have struggled with in the past are being used against me. I feel like I can never afford to fail because of how the world sees me. I should be perfect but once I mess up I am nothing. Sigh. This is hard.

    • I’m sorry to hear that happened, Dee. Words have ways of landing hard when we place huge value on someone else. When someone rejects you—or when someone criticizes you—and you begin to doubt your worth as a person, here’s what not to do: Don’t give that person the “authority” in your life to determine your worth. That’s God’s job. Don’t try to convince them of your value by impressing them or by compromising your moral standards.

      Here’s what I suggest instead. Remind yourself that their evaluation of you fails to match what God thinks of you. Rather than trying to convince them of your worth, cling instead to your value before God.

      Only God gets to determine your value, and He says you have great value to Him.

    • fredbird67

      Dee, we all sin. And if someone considers your sin to be unforgivable, remember this: Those who matter won’t mind, and those who mind don’t matter. In other words, it’s their problem, not yours. Besides, one thing I’ve learned is that when you blow it, in the words of a country song, “you find out who your friends are”. And that’s because, when you’ve blown it, your real friends are those who don’t feel that you’ve done a permanent job. 🙂

  • Kevin T

    Thank you thank you thank you is all I can say! All glory and honor to our Lord Jesus Christ for His glorious gift of salvation and for His Saints such as you to minister to the rest of us it a different level of maturity! KT

    • You’re welcome, Kevin. I’m glad the Lord encouraged you through the post. What an honor. Thanks.

  • CR

    I have a problem. I am 17, and am struggling with a horrid sin I bit while I could not go to church during middle school. It is the same thing Eric C is struggling with. I was able to go back to church two ago, and have a reassurance of my salvation a month ago. Yet, I am still severely struggling with my sin. I want to serve him (God), and I surrender to him continuously, but still I fail. Is it because I say this with my heart, but my mind still is horribly corrupt, or is it because I am not wholly saved? I don’t know if it matters, but I want to study for my pastorates degree, but I cannot continue to do so with such a sin. If anything, it is getting harder. What should I do?

    • The advice I gave to Eric is also my good counsel to you, my brother. Read those several points and commit to doing them all. You might also spend some time with a good Christian counselor. The road before you is difficult but not impossible. You cannot be partially saved. It’s a matter of obedience, self-control, accountability, and love for God. You can’t do it alone.

      • Jordan Dawson

        Hey there Wayne, my name is Jordan. I’ve been saved for 4 years, and I’ve been passionately following Jesus and studying His word and will non stop. I will be very honest, I have used this grace at time as a license to sin. It’s terrible and I look back and I’m horrified at how I could do that. Then other times I’ve done my very best at denying those things. I struggle with sexual sins, and porn. I saw that verse in herbrews 10 and my anxiety kicked in. I since then which was a month ago have severly questioned my salvation. I feel no joy, and I even feel impending Doom. No sleep, no rest, though the Bible gives clear evidence that those that believe on Jesus alone for forgiveness are secure and saved forever, I feel somehow I have lost God. I cant worship or even think about God with the love I had before. I feel I have gone beyond that point or threshold or made some grave mistake. I can’t stand the fact I made those decisions when I look back on those times. I feel hopeless and helpless. I feel like it’s over and I’m finished and I’m one of those false believers the Bible refers to. Others say Satan is having a field day with me and destroying me because I’ve given into lies. I feel I’ve betrayed my God, tough I’m unimaginably sorry and regretful, I feel there is no hope. Do you have any advise you could give me maybe? I don’t know what to do. I’m becoming sick and weak too. I also want anyone to know that just because I did use at times a license, doesn’t mean eternal security isn’t true. I’ve studied it for 2 years straight and it’s clear that those who are His are kept by Him and Him alone. I just am unsure about my walk for the first time ever. Please help.

        • Jordan, I can hear in your words a genuine desire to follow Christ and honor Him. The very fact that you’re struggling is a great sign. Even Paul grieved and marveled at the contradiction of motives he struggled with as a believer (Rom. 7:15). Using grace as a license to sin is a real possibility, as you’ve experienced. But it is not without its consequences—which you’ve also experienced. You’re absolutely spot-on that the Scriptures affirm your security. It is not loss of salvation that is grieving your heart—it is loss of fellowship. The Holy Spirit removes the peace that is the fruit of the Spirit when we step outside of God’s will; also God determines to discipline His children so that they will repent and walk with Him again (Hebrews 12). As far as that passage in Hebrews 10 (and ch. 6), listen to my message: “Are You Sure You’re Secure?” That may give you some answers on that difficult passage.

          Just this morning I was reading in Joshua 24 about Joshua’s challenge to Israel to “choose today whom you will serve.” It’s not only a moment in time—but “today” also suggests a daily decision. There is no corner we’ll turn that “fixes” us or removes the triggers that send us down the rabbit hole of lust’s lies and deceit. We just need to determine each day and moment who is our God. But if you find yourself unable to respond consistently well to the triggers, you really should bring somebody else into your world to help you. It’s doubtful you’ll break free alone. Swallowing pride is better than living the rest of your life on the tightrope. I’m telling you there is hope. There really, really is.

          I hope you’ve also read my advice to another brother on this post who struggled with this issue as well. The counsel I shared with him includes some good, practical next steps for you as well. I urge you to take them. Again, there is hope—and you can find it proven by the fact that the Lord hasn’t taken your life. He has let you live as His child so that you, like the Prodigal in Luke 15, will “come to your senses” and return to the Father. The Father is waiting to run to you, Jordan. You cannot out-sin the grace of God.

          • Jordan Dawson

            I am so sorry I didn’t get back to his comment sooner. I didn’t realise I got a response. I want to thank you more than you know for answering my question and actually taking time to make a sincere reply that really added to the healing process and steps needed to take in order to move forward in this walk I have in Christ. It is much appreciated and I cannot be grateful enough sir. God bless you in your journey , will be praying for you Wayne!! 🙂👍

          • You’re welcome, Jordan. Rare is the reader who returns to thank me! So thank you. You’ve come to mind a number of times since my reply days ago; I’ve been praying for you.

          • Jordan Dawson

            Hey there sir. I wanted to give you an update on my progress. I’ve been getting better physically and mentally still struggling. I keep trying to remind myself of God’s promises. However, I think I’ve become psychologically obsessed with the idea that when I die I’ll wake up in hell. As ubsurd as that sounds, I don’t understand it either. I continue to remind myself of how salvation doesn’t depend on myself and my state, but my standing with God is as His son forever. I keep getting scares that if I’m struggling with my simple belief in Jesus now, was I ever saved to begin with? At the same time when I think that, I remember that if I think that I’m calling God a liar and then am further discouraged. It’s like a mind game I’m trapped in. I hope your doing ok !!

          • Jordan, the lies you’re hearing sound similar to what Eve heard in Eden: “Did God really say…?” Consider the source. Go with God’s Word and not your feelings. If you weren’t saved, you wouldn’t struggle with whether you were. Even if you die with doubt, you’ll awaken to a magnificent surprise.

          • Jordan Dawson

            Wow lol Mr Stiles, you have a way with words. Thank you ! And I talked to my pastor’s wife last night at church. She was telling me that the problems is most true Christian’s unfortunately aren’t honest enough to admit that they have been through something similar as I am going through right now. She told me she’s 70’s and no one in her entire life gave her advice on the exact same thing I’m going through right now. She said everyone has a battle they struggle with their whole lives. She said to not look at it as bad what I’m going through but a test and a pruning where God is allowing me the privelage to learn from my mistakes and to become stronger coming out of this whenever that may be. She said I’m not even 5 years old, that I’m still a babe in Christ and after a longer period of time, these tests won’t rock me as hard later down the line, and that he is preparing me for the road ahead. She said the devil hasn’t told one truth but EVERYTHING he has said or done is a lie. She said that he will do absolutely anything that will trick us into thinking contrary to God’s word and promises. So thank you sir once again for your reply and understanding in this matter!!

          • Not helpless but hopeful

            I have felt exactly like Jordan feels as I have struggled w same sex attraction and have given into the temptation and them come back completely and utterly in remorse and know that I don’t even like it or want anything to do with it! Everything Jordan said is exactly how I have felt. I tell God that HE is he only one that knows me, my struggles and sin and I really don’t have anyone to bring i to my life to help me. When I stay in the Word of God, I have peace and I don’t fall prey to this fleshly lust that displeases God. Anything you can share Wayne that would encourage me and others. All I can do is confess and go on and live in obedience and not use the grace of God to sin. Help us Lord.

          • Thanks for sharing your struggles– and the solution, though not easy, is clear. Your own words show the main key to your healing and progress: “When I stay in the Word of God, I have peace and I don’t fall prey to this fleshly lust that displeases God.” Another essential part of victory is accountability; don’t sidestep that one too. If you’ve not yet read the book, The Game Plan, it is a must-read for those struggling with sexual sin.

  • Kimberly

    Yes I have been the person who thought (and still does too often) think I have to be perfect I guess, so I can understand. It was amazing my friend send me this article yesterday I think it may have been and then last night I start reading some some of The Spirit-Filled life by Charles Stanley and I think this goes along with that.

    • You’re not alone, Kimberly. The only perfect One human is Jesus Christ, of course, and His sacrifice for us makes us positionally as perfect as Him—the only way we can meet God’s standard. I love how the Lord brought these various elements together for you in such a way that you cannot miss His message of grace and encouragement to you personally. Thanks for sharing them.

  • Another Brick

    Thanks for the article, appreciate it. I’ve been struggling with sexual sin and plenty of other stuff as well. I came back to christ about a year and half ago from a life of drugs, alcohol, women, pretty much everything. It’s been extremely difficult for me to adopt what I consider to be a christian way of life and have struggled and repeatedly failed. The one sin that bothers me the most is certain sexual sins that I’ve continued to commit. While I do think I’ll be able to conquer acting on those desires, my fear is mainly dating somebody in the future and having to tell them about all of the things that I’ve done in the past. While I am very critical of myself for what I’ve done I think I’m even more scared of what other christians would think about the things I’ve done, specifically a future wife. I understand that you don’t just blurt these things out and only after a long time would I share those things, but it’s a scary thought.

    I think, in general, this can be a serious problem within the christian community, that everyone is striving to be this perfect person, which is great, but at the same time it can sometimes give off the vibe that while everyone of course still sins that its like this sort of lesser degree type of sinning: bad thoughts or not sticking up for somebody or whatever, or at least that’s the perception. When you actually commit a sin that you feel is significantly worse than what you feel most people are going through within that community it’s hard not to feel extremely judged and almost like some sort of outcast. For some reason I find it easier to tell these types of things to non-christians than to christians and that is troubling. It’s not even that most christians wouldn’t be sympathetic and understanding, it’s just that people tend to feel more judged when they tell horrible sins to people that they feel can’t relate. Yet again, I feel like you’d be surprised at how many christians could relate. But that’s the thing, it’s not about reality, it’s about the perception. For some reason there’s some type of fear instilled to let yourself fully be seen by somebody you view as a really good person. I feel that this could also point to why people are scared of God, in a sense, because he’s supposed to be the greatest of all possible things, this perfect entity, and to be fully seen by something that’s perfect in every way it’s hard not to feel extremely judged. Yet, with God it’s a bit easier to tell him things because he already knows. I don’t know, I’m just thinking out loud here, I apologize for the length.

    • Thanks for sharing. I agree, there are more of us who struggle than we realize, and the pressure to fake it is huge. I think this post about clearing your guilty conscience might offer some encouragement and insight for your journey. I’m praying that God blesses you and gives you the courage to draw close to Him. Thanks.

  • inigo

    I am 41 years old and am a christian. I was brought up that way and so I don’t remember a life changing moment where the Holy Spirit entered my life, as I have heard so many people say. I’m sure there are sins I commit that I’m not even aware of, but the two I know I struggle with are lust and anger. I think I always have. I’ve asked Christ to come into my life, to take over, to take these out of me, especially anger, as it seems to control me. The older I get the more I feel like I’m going insane. I over analyze every thought, every word, every thing that comes from me. I want silence in my head. I have thought about getting on medication but I am ashamed and embarrassed by this. I listen to audio bible often and read and pray but I feel I am not doing something right. I seem to have more success in controlling my lust by staying away from certain things or trying not to look at the beautiful women around me, but my anger comes on in a flash (for dumb reasons) and before I know it I’ve lost it, cursing and yelling, and then a minute later I feel like a fool. I read about the “fruits of the spirit” such as self control, joy, peace, gentleness, patience, etc. and I seem to possess none of these. I get angry just thinking about my failure. I could use some help, please.

    • You’re not alone, Inigo, in your struggle with anger. Someone once said that if you keep doing what you’re doing you’ll get the same results. I urge you to push past your embarrassment and shame (and pride) and use this link to find a good counselor in your area. Sometimes the wisdom of a person trained in Scripture can help break free those habits that have stayed lodged for so long. Don’t put it off. Life is too short, my friend. God bless you.

    • Phil

      inigo, as Wane said, you are not alone. I could even have taken your comment and posted it as my own, the similarities are uncanny!
      I have started to overcome my lustful thoughts, but am by no means free from them. My biggest remaining transgression is anger. I too get angry for the silliest of reasons. While I’m experiencing anger, I stop and think to myself “discard this anger, it’s not what Jesus would do”, but because I’m hyped up, I cannot immediately cool off. Thankfully it’s never escalated to a physical level, but it still gets my heart racing and I know it defiles me.
      It typically dissipates when my mind switches to something else; and then later, I feel intense remorse. Most of my anger is the result of how I have been treated by others, but I know that doesn’t make it right.
      I’m sorry I can’t offer any advice beyond that which Wayne has already provided. I just wanted you to know that there are others struggling with similar issues.
      God bless you.

      • Thanks so much, Phil. May God continue to bless you.

      • Lisa

        As I understand Jesus said Be angry and sin not’. i don’t know if we can wipe out our emotions but can choose certainly how we direct them 👍

    • Juan

      I know this post is already a year past but I just arrived….I hope that you’ve overcome your anger by this, but hey, same thing, lust and anger, im only 19 and im also like you, for dumb reasons i lose it, smashing furniture, yelling, cursing, etc. lust, same, for me, masturbation…

  • ForgivenSinner

    I don’t pretend to be an expert in the translation of the Bible from Greek/Aramaic to English but I have heard it said that in Matthew 5:48 when Jesus says “perfect” he means “complete” and not “flawless”

    • That’s a good point to bring up. The context has to determine the meaning for this word. Either way, because it is a comparison with the Father, the standard is unattainable without Christ. Thanks.

  • Drahcir

    Too me when many people read this. They will think alright it’s cool to sin without no effort of trying. Thinking we have a license to sin. I don’t agree. Yes it may be impossible but to not give an effort is Ludacris..True believer should be followers. I know we may stumble, but for some to think keep on sinning it’s ok I believe…where’s the repentance? don’t make much sense to me.

  • Jeni

    I need serious help there curtain sin I’m really struggling with and it just seems like its happening more everyday I do feel the conviction because the shame and everything i feel but after i pray i feel better then next day i slip again and I pray to the lord for forgiveness and I put my faith in his hands and more I ask him to help me the more I fail him but im seeing how much I need jesus right now as Many people will say to me when i face the lord on that day ill be lukewarm and I’ll be one who saying this, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’nd I’m starting to get tired and burnout with others who say they are Christian who just tells me either I have lost salvation or I’m going be the one in the lines with I will be one of those who say to the lord on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles and Lord say I never knew you and just because I keep sinning the same sin that I’m struggling with they tell me I’m going to hell .I’m tired of fighting this fight and I hate the sin I struggle with but I tend to cave in and I can’t help feel like I’m failure to God because I can’t stop with this sin I’m struggling with

    • Jeni, you’re not alone in your struggle with sin. You have not lost your salvation; don’t listen to those who tell you so. If you’re really at a point of needing “serious help,” then determine to seek it. Connect with good Christian counselor in your area. The sooner you do, the sooner you’ll begin to enjoy the freedom that is yours in Christ.

  • wft2969

    Great writing here…I get flustered because my church says you must “surrender” your life to Jesus. While I would love to do that, I know there is no way as a human being, I could do that. It is not possible. There will always be some area in my life that I will want for my own, no matter how hard I try. So many times I get frustrated thinking that without total surrender, I am not saved. Lie #1 seems to go hand-in-hand with the concept that we must totally surrender and it causes me to want to give up even trying to think that I am saved…

    • I understand that frustration. If we think about it, it’s not logical that we “surrender” all to the Lordship of christ in order to be truly saved. If true Christians did that—and that’s what made them true Christians—then there would be no need for most of the epistles in the New Testament. They continually urge Christians to live a holy life. Because we need that urging.
      Thankfully, the Word of God gives us the grace to learn obedience day by day. Just keep going, my friend. God bless.

  • Christopher Mitchell

    Wow. I hate this article already.

  • Lisa

    Wayne, I have struggled with wondering if I can be forgiven for an abortion I had when I was young for over 40 years has past since 1976 EVERY DAY THIS HAUNTS ME I’m a Christian. I have a music ministry I love The Lord I’M TRYING TO FEEL HIM AROUND ME IS THIS SIN HINDERING A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM PLEASE HELP

    • I’m so sorry, Lisa, that you’ve faced this regret for so long. YES, you can be forgiven. It’s essential that you begin in your heart with truth rather than with feelings. As you read Romans 8:1, you realize there is NOW no condemnation for those who are in Christ. As I wrote in this post, we are often most hard on ourselves with regard to our sins. You might read this post on the two types of forgiveness. If you have accepted Christ, Lisa, then He has accepted you. He died on the cross for your sins before you had committed any of them.

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  • Spence Ferrin

    I struggle with actual sexual sin and porn addiction. I give in once in a while and then I cry for forgiveness and beg god to take away my desire or to make me strong enough not to give in. The tape in my head for 40 years has replayed that I am going to hell, and with my current sin, I just keep re-recording and playing hell over and over again… I can’t get into my head that my sin is forgiven and that I am saved.

  • Christina Huang Jenny

    I struggled with this before “Since I never seem to break free from sin, then sin all I wish! Anyways, I will be forgiven.” I abused the freedom in Christ by sinning as I wish. But God said, “Not to abuse our freedom in Christ to continue living in sin!”

    • You’re absolutely right, Christina. As Paul wrote in Romans 6, we may still be forgiven, but the sin could take our lives. Hardly worth it! Never give in, no matter how hopeless it feels. God is much larger than our feelings—and so is the truth.

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  • Linda Blackmore

    I am truly as filthy as rags. I was introduced to gambling and it’s an addition I cannot conquer. I have even stolen because of it. It’s my ‘free will’ to continue but it’s so powerful. The slot machine is an idol. Stealing is breaking one of many commandments. I love my Saviour with ALL my heart. I constantly pray and praise Him. When I do house works, drive, make dinner, etc. I read with faith out loud Psalms 91 and admitted it to my children but not the stealing part. No! It’s not them I steal from. I am a disgrace and I have failed Him too many times. I want to fast. Will that help and deliver me? I’m scared and ashamed.

    • You’re not alone, Linda, in your struggle. As hard as it is to believe, freedom is available— but you’ll likely not achieve it simply by fasting or by continuing to do what you’ve done. It takes courage to share as you have, and I believe that courage will also be part of what will help you walk with God again as you want to do. Let me put it this way, as I often have with others (and with myself). If you had cancer, you’d go to whatever physician you could and you’d pay whatever it took. Why? Because it is your life. This is no different. I urge you to connect with a good Christian counselor and talk this through from a biblical perspective. You can find a counselor in your area with this link:
      You’re not alone. I’ve been to counseling before as well, and it was very helpful. God bless you as you seek the Lord—and draw close to Him. There is freedom ahead. Be courageous and seek it.

  • Anna Solovio

    Im a Christian for almost 40 years, but, im till struggling with a few habitual sins, laziness, lying, and, some other. Maybe, because of those sins, i cannot grow as a christian, sometimes i wonder, if im even saved, or, maybe, i lost salvation, i’m just ondering, if a Christian has just one or two willful sins, that is unconfessed, or, unrepentant, will God send him to hell if he dies in those sins?

    • Those are great questions, Anna. The good news is, God has clearly answered them in His Word. Willful sins certainly can hinder your spiritual growth, as they invite God’s discipline into your life (Hebrews 12:5-8). However, if you have trusted in Jesus as the Son of God who died on the cross for your sins– and rose again– then your sins are forgiven. You cannot lose by works what you gained by God’s grace (Titus 3:5-7; 1 John 5:11-12). One or two willful sins is one or two too many. Our desire should be to turn from sin, not to take advantage of God’s grace and continue in it. Be courageous, Anna, and live fully for God.

  • Daniel McGowan

    I am 25 years old and I am struggling with habitual sins, like doing drawing comics and playing video games for 2 hours. I love to do these things because it keeps me away from sinful things, like profanity, hanging out with bad friends, or other sinful things. I heip around my mom’s house all the time to keep out of trouble and bad things, but I was wondering if doing the right thing like drawing or games is an addictive thing even if you are staying out of trouble and living for God? Please help me.

    • Of course, it’s always a good thing, Daniel, to avoid sin and to choose good. But your primary need before God is to be righteous– which you cannot do on your own. You’ll need to place your faith in Jesus to forgive you– before you try to do anything else. You have no greater need, and God has provided you the way through Christ.

  • Brian

    Wayne, I am a white man who wants to change my skin color to black. I know god loves me just the way I am but I feel like you have more protection in society when you are black. The media always portrays black men as tougher. And I feel like I could take up for white people better if I was black. I want to do this BAD. If I get the chance I will at least temporarily go black. But hopefully for life. I do like the look of dark chocolate skin. How do you think god would feel about this? Do you think I will still be saved? I do. I feel very strongly about this. I pray everyday. If I get the opportunity I am very determined to do it. I think it would be fun. But I think its necessary.

    • Our sovereign God made you the way you are, I would trust him and stick with it.

  • wft2969

    God spoke to me through your article. Ever since I heard my pastor talking about “evidence” that we are saved by the changes in our lives, I get to the point of giving up sometimes, as my struggles with besetting sins haunt me everyday. I do what I hate and hate what I do. I am fearful that changes are not evident. Sometimes I cannot show evidence of a change – then I stumbled across your article and it has given me a great sense of relief. I know that I can do better – and you reminded me NOT to doubt my salvation. God bless you and thank you!

    • You’re very welcome, and I’m thrilled that the truth has helped to “set you free.” We really must base our security on what His Word says, and not on our lives. Our obedience is pretty flimsy evidence of salvation; instead it proves we needed His salvation! 🙂 Someone once said that it’s better to “doubt your doubts rather than doubt what you know is true.”

  • Bailey_Tnusheq

    Hi there. I have…a REALLY bad sin. I grew up in the church and thought that I was saved when I wasnt. My best friend popped that lie for me and I have been feeling terrible. (for about 6 months). I want to follow Christ and to utterally believe that His blood has covered me. But I grow terrified when I find that despite trying to follow Him, I find A LOT of His teachings scarry and I find myself growing…horribly annoyed with Him saying that He needs to be the center of my life. It’s a terrible sin. It’s like I say that I want Him and yet I dont want to put Him first. It scares me half to death and I keep trying to push these involuntary thoughts out. But they keep coming back. Again and again I find myself wanting to do the same old things that I used to do. Things like lazily playing a video all day on my off day or watching a lot of TV. There are definately sinns that have dropped from my life, and I do my best to avoid them, but the call to deny myself has me shaken. I have no idea how to even begin or how to make myself even WANT to half the times.

    • Bailey, although the enemy of our souls would have you believe your doubts are unique, they really aren’t. Because of our fallen nature, we DO resist Christ’s call to be Lord of our lives. But the most important decision you can make is to believe that Jesus died for your sins. I wouldn’t get hung up on the details of your daily walk with God until you get that one issue nailed down first. Nothing else is more important. Only then, can you learn to obey through the renewing of your mind day by day. God’s grace will be patient with you. But first things first.

      • Bailey_Tnusheq

        Oh wow, so basicly. I already believe that Jesus IS the one way. Period. So all the praying and all the asking for forgivenness from Him these months has been it? Just believing that He died to cover MY sins? That’s enough? I’m sorry. I’ve been miserable because I see that so much of everything I just can’t do without some kind of sin attached. But simply believing that He’s the only way is just it? Obviously, Christ IS God. He said it in the Bible. I have trouble figuring out how God the Father and Christ and the Holy Spirit are one and the same, but I believe that they are cause they said they are. And, thanks for the quick reply.

        • Bailey, it may help to understand clearly the two types of forgiveness. Check out this post and see if it doesn’t help some.

          • Bailey_Tnusheq

            Thanks! And yeah, the separation from fellowship with God is just not fun. At all. It comes in just feeling absolutely terrible for me. It’s hilarious to say, but it seems that I have no fun with anything at all as long as there’s sin between me and God. Thanks again for posting, and for being so prompt in that posting!
            I’ve already saved these two pages for when something like this happens again.

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  • Valkyrie Joos

    I really appreciated this information. I have a good friend who is a Christian brother and he struggles with addiction. I heard him speaking to his dad who said if one continues in sin he doubts if he or she has really been saved. I knew in my heart this was not just wrong, but the too common cruel imposition of the judgement of who themselfs profess and have gravely missed the point. It is not true, God is concerned about what separates us from his love. Because we are not enjoying and rejoicing in the abundance. It is not because we desire or even do things that are “sins” it is the act of spiritual separation that accompany them and the shame and self-loathing they create that is the sin. That includes voices that tell us we are somehow horrible or no good and such. Believing these lies….and imposing them..because only by God’s grace and blood we are saved. Thank you for articulating it so well.

    • Thanks, Valyrie. I grieve over the lack of grace so many of us fail to dispense, while at the same time, we’re all-too-eager to receive it personally from God. The grace we receive is the grace we should give others. A tough assignment, to be sure. Thank you for your encouraging words.